Promotions and Time Warps

So, we've been going at this a year now. You would really think we would have gotten a BFP. I mean if you are at a job for over a year, you might get a promotion or a raise at the very least. If only that were true in the TTC game.

Or what about Mario? He got to cheat time with a Time Warp. Wish we had something like that.

Just a few thoughts I had today lol.

My eyes...

I never thought a post about my eyes would make it onto my TTC blog, but ya just never really know...Well I've been having trouble with my eyes. I wear glasses and they've worked great! I go in annually for an exam. My vision has been blurring or running together, dry eyes and I've been having a headache. So I made an appointment. I thought for sure I was going blind or something. And the doc says my vision has IMPROVED so my glasses were now to strong. I was stunned. She said something about my nearsightedness but I can't remember. She was talking to me during the glaucoma test and those drops friggin BURN. And so being the Googler I am, I looked up reasons for vision changes and well of course.....

What it is: The blurred vision and dry, irritated eyes that are so common during pregnancy.

What causes vision changes during pregnancy: Pregnancy hormones (what else?) that decrease tear production (ironically, since they certainly don't decrease crying!), leading to eye dryness, irritation, and discomfort. Hormones also cause fluid buildup in your eyes, the same way they make your ankles swell. This can lead to changes in the curvature of your eye, which causes a change in your vision. Not only can these changes make contact lenses uncomfortable, but they can change the way glasses work. If a woman is already far-sighted, she usually becomes less far-sighted while pregnant. If she has normal vision or is near-sighted, she usually would become near-sighted or more near-sighted.

Looking forward to my doctor appointment Wednesday. I'm now 16 days late. It's CD54

Shut the Eff Up

I ran across this blog and fell in love! At this point in my TTC journey, it's just what I'm thinking - STFU Fertiles.

Angela's Famous One Pot Chili

Everyone loves my chili. It's really simple too!

Ingredients

• 3 lbs ground beef
• 2 packages McCormicks Original Chili Seasoning
• 3 cans chili beans
•  2 cans Original Rotel
• 1 can tomato sauce
• 1 medium onion, chopped
• 3 tbsp Frank's Red-Hot Hot Sauce
• 1/4 tsp chili powder
• Pepper to taste

Directions

1. In a large soup pot, combine ground beef and onion. Dust the top with pepper. Brown. Drain.
2. Empty both packets of chili seasoning on top of cooked meat. Take each packet and fill with water one at a time and pour on top of seasoning. Stir. Heat to bubbling, then reduce heat. Cover and simmer for 5 minutes.
3. Add chili beans, Rotel (do NOT drain, add the entire can), tomato sauce, hot sauce and chili powder. Stir thoroughly. Heat to boiling. Cover and reduce heat. Simmer for at least 30 minutes.

Bad: Days and Luck

Some days are just plain hard. This is one of them. You never know which days are going to be tough and what will happen to make it a hard day. It doesn't take much when you're TTC, especially over a year. Just going out of the house and to stores, you are certain to see babies, toddlers and pregnant women. I think Facebook is evil, yet I still log on every day to see ultrasounds pictures, cute videos and such. Not that I blame them, Lord knows if I had a little one my Facebook page would be plastered. It's just a lot to take in sometimes and it reminds you that you are no closer to that than you ever have been. Luck of the draw? Maybe. I never was lucky.

We all dream a lot – some are lucky, some are not. But if you think it, want it, dream it, then it’s real. You are what you feel."
~Tim Rice

It's so unfair

It really gets on my nerves to hear people complain or not be appreciative of their kids. Don't get me wrong, I understand some complaining but if that's all you do - don't talk to me. I am a person who would go through a lot to be sleep deprived and have no 'me' time. I've had enough 'me time' to last a lifetime. It's lonely. No, I don't want you tell me "You're lucky you don't have kids and can do what you want." If you are jealous of me, that's really sad, because what I want to do is have a child and spend all of my time with them. But by some twist of fate, you have a bunch of kids you'd rather not have and I have ZERO. So please, if you are having a pity party about how much it sucks being a mom - don't invite me, I have my own pity party to attend.

While we try to teach our children all about life,
Our children teach us what life is all about.
~Angela Schwindt

Angela's Chinese Chicken & Broccoli

I love Chinese food! I don't remember when I decided to take a stab at making it, but it's not bad!

Ingredients
1 pack of boneless skinless chicken breast
1 bottle of Lawry's Teriyaki Marinade
1 medium onion chopped
1 bag of frozen Schezwan mixed vegetables (or a bag of broccoli)
1 can of sliced mushroom (or you can use fresh)

Directions

1.  Place chicken in a storage bag and empty about half the bottle of marinade in it. Close the bag and move the chicken around til it's all thoroughly coated. Place baggie in a pan and lay flat. Put pan in fridge for about an hour. Make sure your bag of veggies is thawing at this point.
2. After about 45 minutes, chop the onion up. 
3. Take chicken out and cut it up. You want the pieces to be about and inch wide and half an inch thick.
4. Put a little butter in a skillet and melt. Add chicken. Cook about 5-10 minutes or until the pieces are thoroughly cooked. Cut a piece in half to make sure it's done.
5. Add veggies, onion and mushroom and cover. Let cook about 10-15 minutes.
6. Uncover and test the softness of your vegetables. This is a personal preference, so you will have to be the judge. If they are to your liking, pour remaining marinade over the whole skillet and let simmer a few minutes.

Today I'm serving this with Bird's Eye Steamfresh chicken flavored rice. It's good with plain white rice too - make a bed of white rice and spoon the chicken and broccoli on top.You'll have lots of teriyaki sauce to flavor up the rice.

What to do with myself

Guess I'll have some free time now. You really don't realize how much time you spend obsessing about something until you stop. Last night I started a food blog. Which is kinda funny. I want to eat healthier and lose weight, but I may end up emotionally eating so either way - the food blog works lol.

Follow me now!

Enchiladas

This is a borrowed recipe from Campbell's, and it's Mmm Mmm good, too!

 Ingredients

 1 pound ground beef
 1 package taco seasoning mix or burrito seasoning mix
 1  can refried beans
 1 can Cheddar Cheese Soup
 1 onion chopped
 1 package flour tortillas
1 1/2 cups prepared enchilada sauce
 shredded Cheddar cheese

Directions

1. Heat the oven to 350 degrees F. Cook the beef in a 10-inch skillet over medium-high heat until well browned, stirring often to separate meat. Pour off any fat. Stir the seasoning mix, beans, soup, onion and rice, if desired,in the skillet.
2. Divide the beef mixture among the tortillas. Roll up the tortillas and place seam-side down into a 3-quart shallow baking dish. Pour the enchilada sauce over the filled tortillas and sprinkle with the cheese.
3. Bake for 20 minutes or until the enchiladas are hot and bubbling. 

I served these with some Taco flavored rice. It was deelish!

Snickers Cake

This decadent treat includes the candy it's named for as well as caramel. It's always been a real crowd pleaser.

Ingredients:
2 jars of Smuckers Caramel Sundae sauce
1 tub of Cool Whip
1 bag of mini Snickers
1 box of German Chocolate cake mix (and the ingredients to make the cake such as eggs, oil, etc)

1.  Prepare cake as directed on box. 
2. While cake is baking, chop up your candy bars as small as you want them. It's up to you! 
3. Take cake from oven when done and let cool. 
4. When cake has cooled, use a butter knife and poke holes in the cake. Pour the caramel sauce over cake slowly and let it seep into the holes and sides of cake pan. 
5. Stir Cool Whip and loosen it in the container. Add heaping spoonfuls onto the cake and spread as "frosting" 
6. Sprinkle your candy bar pieces all over top of the cake. 

And here is the finished cake :)

At this point

We aren't actively TTC anymore. At least for now. It's been a long and unsuccessful road. It's left me with a lot of unanswered questions about why it isn't happening for us. So with the super long cycle, we end the active portion and enter the NTNP, or "not trying, not preventing." I'm gonna try to get things sorted out with my body and find out what is going on. I've suspected PCOS for a long time now, I've just never had the tests done. And with nursing school approaching in July, it makes sense to put this on the back burner because I really don't want to be pregnant for that. After these 14 months of trying, I've just lost my hope. It's going to still be really hard to not try because I still want it very much. I think I will start ending my posts with a quote - I love quotes. Well, words in general. Music lyrics, too. They kind of encapsulate what I'm thinking/feeling, because sometimes I just ramble :P

Love the moment. Flowers grow out of dark moments. Therefore, each moment is vital. It affects the whole. Life is a succession of such moments and to live each, is to succeed.

- Corita Kent

A real blogger

I swear I'm going to blog now. For real! So updates - still not pregnant, 50 days since AF, going to a new doctor October 13th. I really hope she can help me. So, I'm off to work more on getting this thing updated.